Monday, June 30, 2008

Walmart's Asshole

I guess the marketing geniuses over in Bentonville, Ark., home of the world's most hated retailer, Walmart, don't read much Vonnegut. Right now, up in heaven, Kurt Vonnegut is laughing his ass off. Or maybe it's his asshole.

Seems Walmart needs a new look, so after having ruined the smiley face for us, they've decided to screw up the good ol' asterisk. What they didn't know was KV was years ahead of them and had abused the asterisk so well I still giggle a bit everytime I see one.

Here's a quote from KV's Breakfast of Champions followed by the appropriate illustration:

I am programmed at 50 to perform childishly--to insult 'The Star-Spangled Banner,' to scrawl pictures of a Nazi flag and an asshole and a lot of other things with a felt-tipped pen. To give an idea of the maturity of my illustrations for this book, here is my picture of an asshole:

Oops! Sorry, that's not Kurt's asshole, that's Walmart's asshole, er, new corporate logo. And, I hope they spent a fortune on it! This is the asshole Kurt drew:

Notice the resemblance? I sure did. Kurt, even up in heaven you're still making me laugh, and you've taken the edge off my Walmart hate. I still won't shop there, though.

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